Wednesday, January 02, 2008

a year has passed...

Has it really been a year?

Still feels like just yesterday that I said my last goodbye. Still feels just like yesterday I saw him with his eyes closed and his body cold. Still feels like just yesterday I lost my father...

And everyday, I miss him. I miss him even more at night. I miss him even more when all the families are together. I miss him even more when I look at Mama...

A year has passed since Abah went away. And yet, it feels just like yesterday we said our goodbyes and grieved. Oh how I miss him! How we miss him. Has it really been a year?

There are lots of unspoken words left to be said, but he is not around anymore to hear it. We still need his hand to guide us through our lives... but now we have to manage without him. A hope to have my father along during our graduations disappeared as he closed his eyes for one final time. Not one of us managed to get him to be the witness to one of our many successes. A dream to witness my father as a wali was shattered to pieces when he went away. 7 daughters and their father will not going to be there to give their hands away.

A year it has been... since I said my last goodbye to my beloved father. I miss you, Abah...

4 comments:

  1. Salam Ummi,

    Stumbled upon your blog while looking for other info. Nevertheless, I feel sorry for the lost of your beloved Abah. Remember that Allah loves him more than we all do. I cannot say that I understand how you actually feel though my Ayah has also passed away 7 years ago. Anyway, my heart goes to you. Believe me, when someone you really love moves on to another life, you will not forget him/her, but you will one day, learn how to deal with it. One advise for you my dear, be brave and be strong.

    -Red-

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ummi, U r tagged!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. yeah, ummi. be strong okie?

    ReplyDelete
  4. red: thank you for dropping by. and thank you for your words of encouragement.

    soraya: cesss~

    adiba: am trying

    ReplyDelete

Words could heal... or it could hurt or maybe, it won't bring any difference. Either way, just type away!