wordless wednesday #16 - selamat hari raya!

a reason to celebrate

"And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may live in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between you;

Verily, in that are signs for people who reflect"

-Quran 30:21-

I would have never guessed that this cousin of mine will be getting hitched at such a young age. But there you go, his jodoh dah sampai. And be happy for him is what I'm gonna do. He's happy, that's what matters, no?

The engagement-tahlil-solemnization function was held at Bagan Serai, Perak on Saturday. The nears and dears were present, including yours truly. Along with hubster, of course and my mother- and sister-in-law. The official color for the function is blue.

Started off with the engagement ceremony. Siap berpantun bagai, kau! It was an intimate and laughter-filled ceremony.
Papa was the head of the rombongan.

 

The groom-to-be entered the house to be presented to the bride-to-be's family.

The blushing, and very pretty bride-to-be.

With the future sister-in-law, Alia.

Engagement ceremony done. The newly-engaged couple looks dashing, yes?

After the engagement ceremony, the soon-to-be husband and wife were ushered off to change into their solemnization attire. While we stuffed our faces with food. Then, the tahlil commenced outdoor while the females gossiped gathered inside.

And before we knew it, the solemnization ceremony began. Yet another intimate ceremony. A beautiful one, too, if I may add.

From her to him.

The wedding ring! Precioussssss.

Dua kali lafaz, and he is now a husband.

I had fun, honestly. Families and relatives gathered, with lots of laughter going around. What's not to like, eh? It's a reason to celebrate. Life itself is a celebration.

My heartiest congratulations goes out to my cousin, Azlan and his beautiful wife, Hamadah. You two make a sweet couple. May your marriage be blessed with lots and lots and lots of happiness. Congratulations again from Kak Long and husband!  

Selamat pengantin baru!

here, there and everywhere

I can't sleep. It happens too often these days, I just don't care anymore. Hence, here I am, typing away like it's 2.30 in the afternoon instead of 2.30 early morning.

Recently, when I was in Terengganu, lepaking with the in-laws, I happened to browse through my old posts. Those old junks back when I used to rant a lot. I mean, a lot. Those were the days when I did not limit myself to just 140 characters. Those were the days when I took time composing every single word carefully and rather passionately. Looking back, I realized how much I miss blogging. Yep, I miss it. Pretty weird, eh? Since I update this blog not as often as I would like to. But, hey, here I am, telling those who still care to read that I am still up to blogging. I won't stop. Not yet, anyway.

Phew. Got that out.

Now, let's talk about life. I'll go first, 'kay? I've been married for... hold on a sec, let me count first. Let's see...

Okay, I've been married for almost 6 months now. Still young. Still got a looooooooongggg way to go. But guess what? People are already asking about the 'good news'. Like the single purpose of getting married is to breed and breed only. Come on, people! Entering the world of marriage alone is challenging enough. We're still trying to build some sort of stability here. And anyway, it's not like we can demand the so-called 'new member' right on the spot. It is up to Allah, whether to present us with such blessing. If Allah thinks that we're not ready yet, then so be it. Don't force things that are not of our own accord. Kalau ada rezeki, Alhamdulillah. If not, then we won't complain. It is not for us to decide, remember that. We can try and try and plan, but it is Allah's will that will make anything happen.

Phew. Got that out, too. Productive rambling.

So another cousin is getting married this coming Saturday. One by one, the third generation of Tok Jah's family is getting hitched. That means the family is expanding. Yeay! The more the merrier, they said. So I'm definitely looking forward to the next Aidilfitri. I miss this year's celebration on my side of the family as I celebrated it with Hubster's family. Yes, definitely looking forward to next year. And let's see if we'll have any other additional 'new member' next year. Yes, let's wait and see, shall we.

I'm running out of words now. So I'll stop here. For now. For now, my friends, I bid you adieu.

the-not-so-wordless wednesday - melaka trip

Yes, everyone was busy with their gadget(s). Zaman sekarang...

Hubster enjoying his dinner at Umbai.

Caption is unnecessary.

Handbag models. 1 set of those costs only RM20 (or RM30, eh?). Err... the models are not for sale, though.

Nak jugak tempek gambo berduaaaa!

i got caught up

Hey there, people. So how was your Raya? Great, I hope. My Raya is splendid, as usual. Good food and great company goes a loooooooong way to make you forget your work, even for a while.

Anyhow, something big is happening to me. Big. Major. And just thinking about it makes my stomach twist and turn in every possible way. It's not a bad thing. A good thing (I hope). Let this week past first, then I'll consider whether I'm gonna let you in on the big thing or not. Wish me luck, anyway.

And here comes the pictures from the Aidilfitri celebration. Well, some of it anyway...

My three beautiful sisters, garbed in jubah. Yep, we went for jubah this time around.

My dear, dear Tok laughing with Pak Su. She's so cute, no?

Pak Tam with his antiques. Never fail to make us laugh.

Both my Toks. Mama's side and Abah's side.

Went to arwah Abah's hometown and his childhood home. Felt kinda wistful. And surely, I miss him a lot. Now that my life is about to change in a major way, I miss his presence even more than ever. I hope he's happy and at peace wherever he is. I miss you, Abah. Al -Fatihah...

wordless wednesday #1

why i won't lost my way

There's this one person, who will never ever let me stray too far from my track. She will correct me when I'm wrong. She will reprimand or scold me for things I did that I know wrong but pretend otherwise.She will warn me if have any intention of straying. She keeps me grounded. All the time.

Oh. And she is the person who keeps me from spending my money on err... things I don't actually need.

And she is a year younger than me. She is my sister.

Fondly known as Kak Ngah or Angah among the family, she turns 25 today. Yes, you guess it right. This entire post is dedicated specially for my sister, one of my closest and best friends, Angah.

Happy birthday to you...

Happy birthday to you...

Happy birthday to Angah...

Happy birthday to you!

Happy birthday, dear sis. You're now a year wiser, yeah? I hope all your dreams will come true, Angah. We all know just how hard you work to achieve you have today. You excelled in your studies, your have your own business, you are very grounded and you're one tough cookie. Abah would be so proud of you. Just like we all are.

She's a generous soul, this sister of mine. And ever so helpful and patient. But beware, you don't want to piss her off. Once you get on her bad side, you'll regret it for a looooong time. But she's a fun person to hang out with, mark my word. More so if you're a K-Pop and K-Drama junkie. 3 hari 3 malam pun tak habis cerita weh!

 Angah and me having lunch at IKEA. I usually go out with my sisters.

I am lucky to have her as a sister. Very lucky, in fact. I could never imagine my life without her. Each of my sibling is like a part of my soul, you see. I could never imagine my life without them. Never. Gaduh, gaduh jugak but remember, blood is indeed thicker than water.

Here's to you, Angah. Happy glorious birthday. I heart you.

Oh. Did I ever mention that Angah is single? She is, in fact, very very single. *hint hint*

selamat pengantin baru!

My closest cousin, Intan Suria, just got married last Friday to a great guy, Mohd Fadhil.

She's the first one to step into the world of marriage. She's the eldest among all the cousins and she's the first one to get married. In a way, it feels kinda weird now that one of my cousins (mother's side) is married. Weird because now we have a new member in our extended family. It's a good weird, by the way.

And I'd like to extend a hearty welcome to Fadhil on behalf of my family. We're a crazy and loud bunch so you have to excuse us once in a while, ya? Hehehe.

Anyway, here's the new happily wedded couple:



Selamat pengantin baru, my dear cousin! You looked beautiful on your wedding day, by the way. Malas aku nak komen depan-depan, satgi perasan lebih. Wahahahaha!

I wish you and your husband all the happiness in the world. And may the marriage lasts forever and ever. And may the little brats come along soon.

in the arms of the angel

One of my sisters got admitted to the hospital late last night due to dengue fever. It's the first in the family. Must be some kind of test/dugaan for us because Mama left to Langkawi early morning yesterday. Things just kinda happen when Mama is not around. I guess Mama really is our guardian angel who keeps looking after us even though we thought we can take care of ourselves.

I know it worried Mama a hell lot when one of her children got sick. Just a few days ago I, I had this conversation with her in the car. Mama was thinking about going for umrah. I encouraged her to do so. But somehow, Mama was reluctant. And I know why. Because she knows we'll thrash the house.Because she's not sure whether we will be safe without her. The love and concern of a mother knows no boundaries. Now, I think, more than ever, she will have another reason to not to go for umrah in the near future.

I wish I could convince her that we can all take care of ourselves, that we will be okay without her. Well... for a short time, that is. But the thing is, even I feel at loss when she's not around. The house is never the same without Mama. I am 25 but I still need my mother by my side. Funny, eh? I still feel like my Mama's little girl. I guess I will always feel like that. Even when I'm 30. She's my guardian angel, you see.

For this upcoming Mother's Day, I wish for Mama to know how much I love her. I'll die for her if need be. I know we're making her worry and sad with our behavior but Mama, each and every one of us love you more than we love each other. You are our guardian angel. And our personal doctor. Maybe you should slow down on being so obsessed with health supplements. Really. Okay, don't.

they're homosapiens, you know?

Last night, had a talk with two of my sisters. The much younger ones. I've been feeling down lately and I have this guy trouble. Yes. Guy trouble. How pathetic is that? And to think that it has been bugging me for the last 3 weeks, pathetic doesn't even cover it. I need to lay it out to someone, so there were my sisters.

To my amazement, my youngest sister gave me a piece of her mind that nobody else had ever give. She gave it straight and frank. No reservation. And nothing but the truth. They say the truth hurts and yes, hurt it did. I cried in front of them. A moment of weakness. She said that the guys I've chosen are nothing but useless. I let myself be used and stepped on. She also said that I realized all of that long before but I chose to ignore it because I'm used to it. That all has got to stop, she added. Time for me to think about myself.

Imagine. That coming from my youngest sister. She's in her teens. I'm almost an adult. When did she grow up? How come I missed it? And just how much she knows about me that even I am not aware of? She is indeed well on her way to become a fine lady. Another sister told us about her useless ex. The ex who expected her to pay for everything. She came to her senses quick and dumped him. Good for her. I wish I can say the same thing for me. But at least I have them to shake me up from my delusional self.

Last night had been an eye-opener. Their words penetrated deep into me. And they got me right back on my feet again. Suddenly, I feel much lighter. Suddenly, I'm not checking my phone every 10 fucking minutes. I'm okay. I'm fine. I'm cool. I'm great, even. I am much better off on my own. Thanks to my sisters, I don't feel like dragging my feet through my life anymore. How I am blessed to have them in my life.

It's time to celebrate life. Mine. And it is definitely the time to move on. On my own. With my sisters by my side.

fallen into TRAP

It's Taman Rekreasi Air Panas (TRAP), not that trap. Hehehe. Last weekend, Pak Tam (bless him) took the whole bunch of us to Taman Rekreasi Air Panas (TRAP) Sungai Klah in Perak. We stayed at the 3-bedroom villa at the Felda Residence Hot Springs. The villa was amazing. It was big enough to fit all 14 of us and the best part was the natural hot spring jacuzzi tub! It is the perfect place for timeout with the family.

Each room in the villa have their own bathroom attached. The master bedroom is big and the bathroom comes with a bathtub. Really nice. All in all, the villa got two thumbs-up from all of us. We were deliriously happy with the accommodation. Go here for more information.

The first day there were spent lazing around the jacuzzi and the villa. The boys, only 4 of them , went to the mountain spring pool first. But then is started to rain and boys came back to the villa and jumped into the jacuzzi. When the rain started to pour heavily, they ran inside the villa, demanding food. And then they went to sleep in one of the air-conditioned bedrooms. Typical. Thankfully, the rain started to subside around 5 o'clock. And to the jacuzzi we went. The water was warm and inviting. Heaven!

The second day we went to explore the park, from the natural sauna to the egg-boiling spot. The adults went for the ayurveda treatment provided at the park. All within the walking distant from the villa. After all of that, we jumped in to the jacuzzi again, for the last time. We were very reluctant to leave, to tell the truth. We had a really great time there.

The residence is not completely ready yet but still, it's a nice place. It just opened on 30th May 2009 so everything is practically new. The villa is fully furnished as well. If you're looking for the perfect place to take your family for a holiday, this is it.

missing tok

This picture was taken a day before Aidilfitri last year. Tok, just like every year, was busy preparing ketupat pulut daun palas. If not for Tok, I don't think we will have decent ketupat pulut daun palas during Aidilfitri every single year.

Ahh...

How I miss my dear grandmother.

When I was studying in Penang, I got the chance to see her at least once a month. Now I only got to see her once a year, that is during Aidlifitri because she's now living with my aunt in Kedah. How sad is that? Sad indeed. I remeber those times when I was at Suria's house in Sungai Petani when Tok was around. When Mama and Papa Suria left for work, we had the house to only the both of us. Right after Mama Suria left to school, she would wake me up to turn on the TV. No matter how many times I taught her how to turn on the TV, she will always wake me up to do it instead. I think she was being clever... getting me to wake up early in the morning. Hehehe.

I practically grew up in front of my grandmother's eyes, until I turned 11. There were those 2 years when I lived and went to school in Kedah. We were taught to be independent, so most of the times, we would iron our school uniform on our own. But Tok, being Tok, she would re-iron the uniform for all... I don't know, 6 of us? And of course I still remember the time when she would put coconut oil on my hair despite my constant protest. "Busukla Tok!" I would complain again and again. Tok would just ignore it, again and again.

What I remember the most is her Nasi Goreng Kunyit and Nasi Goreng Sambal Belacan. Yummy! No matter how much I try, my version of Nasi Goreng Kunyit never turned out as good as hers. Bummer. And her fish curry... one of the best ever. The memories linger in my mind of those times when I had my grandmother close by my side when I was sick. She would care for me until I am well enough. She would apply the minyak angin when needed. I sprained my wrist once and she would massage my wrist day and night. She would bandage my wrist up so that tak masuk angin. If I had a headache, she would picit my head until I fell asleep.

Ahh...

How I miss my dear grandmother so much...

balik kampung: it is never too early...

... to buy tickets! That is if you are not driving yourself la kan. Come Ramadhan, the tickets are selling like hot cakes, be it bus tickets or train tickets. Well, I've picked up mine yesterday.

Or should it be ours? Ah. No matter. What matter is this; all four of us will sit through eight or maybe nine hours of backside-numbing journey all the way from KL to Butterworth. Yep. Syaqirin has been bugging me about this journey since a month before Ramadhan. You have to understand, he is yet to experience the balik kampung trip via the train. Little does he know how loooong the trip will be!

Every year, when it is balik kampung time, we have to decide who will be going back via the public transport and who will be going back with Mama. You see, there are nine of us, including Mama. Unless we rent a bus, we could not possibly balik kampung together. There were times when Abah was around, we could all go back together with two cars. Now, a distant memory. Oh well, it's not like we are not used to it anyway.

So first, cabut undi. Syaqirin will of course be excluded because he got this fascination towards public transportation. Either by bus or train, he will definitely hop on board happily. He is actually super-excited to balik kampung with train. Lets see just how long that excitement will last, shall we? I will be excluded as well 'cos I'm the eldest. Meaning, I have to go wherever that little dude go. So, who else will be joining us for the backside-numbing experience? I have an idea but lets just wait until it is finalized.

We'll be going back on the 28th of September, instead of the first-planned 27th 'cos the ticket for 27th is sold out. Mama will be going back on the same date, if according to the current plan. So to Suria, take note, babe. 28th September, Sunday. We'll be departing around 2.30 pm and will arrive around 9.45 pm (holy cow!!!).

How about you guys? Already planned your balik kampung trip?

a july wrap-up

Ahh... how time flew. July is drawing its curtain close and August will descend upon us. Ramadhan is just around the corner. Can't wait for it.

It has been an eventful July, I must say. As eventful as it is, not all of it is pleasant and memorable. One in particular hurt the family in a way. One in particular makes us stop and think very hard of the step we take. It is hard to keep everybody in the family in line. Harder still to keep an eye on each and everyone of us when we have our very own lives to run with our very own set of problem. Not that I'm saying I'm neglecting my family, not in a million years, but I thought we had it okay. I never thought that something like that would happen in our family. Well, I guess there's always a first time for everything.

Sometimes, I feel like it would be so damn easy to just let go and let things take its own course. But then again, how could I just sit and watch everything go by? I would regret it in the end. I am disappointed, nevertheless. Because of the incident, people are talking behind our back now. One of my sisters expressed her frustration to me last night. I didn't tell her, but it was hurtful. Every word was like a knife slicing through my heart. What hurts the most was the fact that my mother's capability and commitment as a mother is questioned by those people. It doesn't matter that her other child turned out good, does it? One bad apple and you are not a good mother. How so very easy to point fingers.

Speculation and wild gossip are being whispered behind our back. It's a sad thing, it makes me angry, but what can I do? You cannot shut the mouth of the people. Mulut tempayan boleh la tutup. Sigh. Whatever happened, I believe there's a hikmah behind it. Do I blame my sister for it? Yes, I do. Do I want to slap her senseless? Yes, I would love to. Do I want her to repeat her antiques again? Try and she'll regret it for the rest of her life. I'm using up every fiber of my beings to stop myself from wringing her pretty little neck and make her feel sorry for what she had done.

And another one got himself suspended from school for two weeks. Wonderful, huh? I do not know how my mother is taking all this in but I'm about to turn into Incredible Hulk anytime now. Sheesh!

That, my friends, is a July wrap-up from me. How's yours?

a tiny scare...

Well, not really. 3.15 this morning...

"Kak Long, bangun, teman Mama pergi hospital jap,"
"Huh? Kenapa?"
"Jantung Mama ni berdegup cepat sangat, dari semalam lagi,"

No more questions asked. I jumped off the bed and changed my clothes. We then went to Hospital Selayang, with Mama driving the car herself. This isn't really the right time to blame Mama for not allowing me to take driving lessons, right? Right.

We went straight to the Emergency Department. Mama went for her check-up alone. She never allowed me to come with her. Oh well. I waited for around 15 minutes, then she came out. Few minutes later her name was called and off she went to the treatment room. I had to really shut my panic down and act as normal as I could.

4.30 a.m., still no sign of Mama. I could not sit still. I kept glancing at the double door leading to the treatment room, wondering if I should go in there or not. Finally I decided to brace myself and go in there. I tried very hard to ignore the what-ifs that were running mad in my head. No, no. Mama will be fine. I kept telling myself that.

Mama was hooked on the machine where the heartbeat is monitored (I don't know what's the name of that machine). Don't panic. Don't panic. I told myself over and over again. So I walked over to her as casually as I could.

"Nape?" I asked, keeping the tremble out of my voice.
"Tak ade ape-ape pun. Dia nak tunggu tengok je. Kenapa masuk sini? Pergila tunggu kat luar,"
"Boring," was all I could muster.
"Pergila duduk kat luar tu,"
"Kejap lagila,"

Mama could never tell what was running through my head at that time. No one could. Beneath my calm exterior, I was shaking like hell. I was scared to death. I am not ready for yet another bad news. We all are not.

Thank God by 6.20 a.m., Mama was allowed to go home. She didn't say anything to me. And I did not dare to ask. Up until now, my head is a mess.

***Updated: Alhamdulillah, Mama is doing OK right now. I think it was caused by all the hype and anxiety of her children falling sick one by one. Her blood pressure was quite high at that moment. Glad everything turned out fine. For those of you who prayed for Mama's health and who showed concern, thank you so very much.

is there something in the air?

I mean, most people in the blog arena is/was sick lately. Last 2 weeks Kakak was hit with a fever. Then last week, Aishah was also hit with a fever. She is yet to fully recover. And yesterday, Kak Ngah and me got the fever bug as well! *sniff sniff*

I could not even move yesterday. I could only throw up and slept through the day, from morning until evening. Mama took me to the clinic in the evening. Doc said my temperature is a tad bit high (38.7 C) and both my tonsils are swollen. Yikes! My muscles hurt everywhere, my head ache, even my eyeballs hurt! Today I feel a lot more better.

Mama must be worried sick. 3 of her kids have fever and another one is infected with something weird. First, there was blood in her pee. Then, she feels pain down there when urinating. Then, she could not err... (what's "berak" in English?) properly. Aanywaay... kesian Mama kan?

Really, is there something in the air?

***Updated: Last night, my little brother became yet another victim. Kesian dia. Mama was up from 3 a.m to look after him and did not go to sleep. She had to go to work. Kesian Mama. Syaqirin was crying a few minutes ago because he had a headache. His body is still hot. After wiping his body with a wet towel, I persuaded him to go to sleep. God knows who's next.

the holiday mission

What's with me and missions nowadays? Well, I have to at least be motivated to do something in life that can be remembered. This time, I'm planning a family vacation. Well, trying to plan one anyway. It has been like, forever the family had had a vacation together. The last time the whole bunch of us went for a vacation was... uh, lemme see, '94 at Cameron Highlands? That was ancient, man! Oh. And 'balik kampung' is not considered as a vacation, for me at least.

The thing about having a big family, transportation is an issue. Furthermore, if you don't have a man to at least be the rational and sane one, problems are bound to arise. However, I aim to be optimistic. And I would really like the family to have a truly good time, and a memorable one at that. So Adik and I came up with a plan that fits our budget just nicely. We planned to go to Teluk Batik. And we chose this chalet to stay at.

Now the problem is to get Mama to agree with this plan. Any idea how? Or do you guys have any other idea on where should we go? Help!

congratulations angah!!!

A proud moment. That what it was yesterday as I watched Angah, decked in the dark blue robe and mortar board accepted her diploma from UiTM's VC in Shah Alam. Mama and I went to our first convocation yesterday. It might be only a diploma, but it meant a lot to her, to Mama and to me as well. It was a start for many other convos, I hope. Angah is now doing her Degree in International Business at UiTM Shah Alam right after finishing her Diploma in Bank Management. She worked hard for the diploma and I know that she earned her reward. She's working even harder for her degree. Angah is like that, always working hard, always serious about her studies (my exact opposite *tee-hee*) Here's a post dedicated especially to you, Angah.

Congratulations, Sis!!! May you succeed in your life...

muhammad syaqirin b. zulkifli

Yep, you read the title right. After posting about his birthday, I feel the urge to tell you more about this little hero of mine. Let me introduce all of you to Muhammad Syaqirin b. Zulkifli, my little brother and the apple of my eye, and my mom, too, of course!

Syaqirin was born on 7th of October 1995. The story behind his coming into this world is rather a fascinating one, albeit a bit sad. When my mother was pregnant with him, my sisters and I were up north because we were living with my aunt while my mother was in KL. Circumstances brought us apart for about 2 years, but it was OK. It taught us to be more appreciative to each other. Back to the story, the truth is, we were never really aware of my mother's pregnancy. Out of the blue, one day, we got a phone call saying that we got a baby brother. A baby brother! After 6 sisters (not that I'm not thankful for that, mind you), I finally have a brother! I was so happy. Nothing could ever describe the happiness that came over us that day.

A week after he was born, my mother boarded a plane straight to Alor Setar. A week! Imagine. See, my mother had no one to look after her in KL. In Alor Setar, my grandma was there and so was my aunt, and so were we. As my mother went through her pantang, I looked after my little brother with such protectiveness that it bordered on obsession *tee-hee*. I just couldn't help it.

The first name meant for this little boy was Muhammad Adam, but my mother thought it doesn't sound right. So, she changed it to Muhammad Syaqirin. Such a beautiful name, but we prefered to call him Baby. I know, I know... a bit off for a boy to be called 'Baby'. That nickname stuck to him for a long time. Well, now we usually call him Qirin, but the 'Baby' calling slips occassionally. He was actually the one who ordered us to stop calling him 'Baby'. He won't answer to 'Baby' anymore. Me? My fave nick for him is 'Cik', short for Kecik (small).

Then, we moved back to KL to live with my mother. By this time, he was about 6-12 months old. My mother was an extremely busy woman back then. She was always out of town. We were to look after ourselves at that time. I was 11. No maid or bibik whatsoever. We only have each other. That was when I learn the meaning of being independent and the meaning of responsibility. I guess it was at this time as well that Syaqirin really grew attach to me. I fed him, I washed him, I put him to sleep. Everything. I did it without any complaints. I did it out of love.

It was some time later than that we were told about my mother's delivery. When she first felt the pain, she was all alone at home. There was no one to take her to the hospital. She couldn't even drive at that time. She had to call a friend to help her out (Allah bless her). I cried when I heard the story. My mother has gone through a lot. When he was born, the person who whispered the Azan to his ear was a doctor (whoever he was, Allah bless him, too). It was heart-breaking to know that both my mother and my brother were left without a family during that time. Such were the circumstances all of us had gone through. However, the hikmah of it all, it brought us closer to each other. We are a close-knit family. For us, family comes first, no matter what.

As a boy growing up with 7 girls, people always wonder how will he turn out. I am happy to report that he is very normal, just like any other boy who is mischievous and rather naughty and fiercely independent. I think he got that from each of us. He irons his own school uniform, washes his own shoe, folds his own clothes, sweeps his own room. He had been doing it since he was 9 or 10. I am very proud of him. Of course, there were some incidents here and there. One being when somebody told us he had been smoking. Yep, smoking. At the age of 12. I was horrified but kept my cool. My mother asked him about it and he was very honest about it. He didn't lie or deny the smoking incident. And he promised never to do it again. In fact, he was very ashamed of it. I trust him with all my heart.

He had grown up so fast my little brother. I used to held him in my arms, inhaled his baby smell, playing with him. Sigh. No more that little guy who I used to wake up in the middle in the night to attend to. He is a big boy now. But still, a 'manja' one. And a very loyal little brother. He is more loyal to me than my mother! *chuckles* He kisses me whenever he has the chance. Always that long, fierce kasi-penyek-pipi-Along kinda kiss. Still ask me to carry (dukung) him. Ahh... my not-so-little brother...

Just keep smiling like that ....

moving on

I am glad to know that the rest of the family is doing great after what happened in January. Everyone is going on like usual. Life is, thankfully, back to normal for us. Well... maybe not as normal. Occassionally, Abah will be mentioned here and there. Sometimes, I thought that the way we mention Abah, it's like he is never gone... like he'll pop-up anytime soon. Another wishful thinking, I suppose.

Looking back, I have to say that life certainly improves for the household. When Abah was around, Mama is always kinda reluctant to spend on luxurious items. Her excuse: Abah will know that she has loads of money. We (my sis and me) always thought that Mama is being ridiculous. Well... what do we know really, right? The world of the adults. Now, however, Mama is trying her best to bring more than comfort to our lives. Mama is doing her very best to be the perfect mother. You are always the perfect mother for us anyway, Mama.

And my sisters and brother, they are growing up so fast that I could not even believe it. And truth be told, I am proud of them. They are holding up strong and good. The laughter never fades. We are a crazy bunch really. We are loud. And we are definitely close to each other. We always will have each other. And I thank God for that.